Accepting my void of knowledge

For me, life has sometimes (may be usually) never had same plans as the map in my mind. Only I can be the best judge of myself because I have been with myself through all course of life, no matter what (for I had to and I don’t know the other way to attempt it).

I can assess the number of ambitions I changed since I first had it. And today, even when my scope of becoming someone has narrowed down to Public Administration, the fear of clinging to a dream is seasoned with uncertainty. The experience has left me with this weakness, or should I call this as strength?

A boy who had passion for science subjects till 10^th grade began despising it in high school grades. Yet, lands up taking Physics and Chemistry as Bachelors subject of focus. Then Royal Civil Service Examination compels him into writing general examinations. Luckily, yeah definitely ‘luckily’, he made through and is today, writing this that you are reading now. Life really had planned a meandering path for me.

So, the modules designed for the Post Graduate Diploma for Public Administration at Royal Institute of Management shall be really a challenge. And Public Finance Management is one that sent through me a shudder of fear. It seems the same shudder had been there in the Hector when Achilles called him for duel fight.

The first class of the module turned out to be illuminating. My respect for the intellectual friends heightened even more. Our lecturer tactfully brought a topic on whether or not government should involve in financial matters of the country.

A friend tackled it by giving a bird eye’s view of the two parties and their works. This opened to various discussions. I could follow few general answers as I know from preparation for RSCE. But my baselessness in subject of Economics and commerce came out bare and visible as they who have good density of it discussed on.  Their discussion slowly narrowed to Capitalism and Socialism. And quite unexpectedly, I was all ears.

Capitalism, as to Kesang, is the better one if the country is to sustain because it brings economic stability. It gives liberty and freedom in terms of market. And socialism, to his calculation, did always fail. He cited example of China. In his backup for success of capitalism was South Korea.

Socialism, to Kinley, is a better option for the country because capitalism will bring in inequality in terms of economic status. Socialism is against it, it will try leveling the amount of privileges rich and development parts enjoy against the poor sections of the society.

Lecturer did demonstrate that there is already a huge income gap in the country. While it is nice proposition, as proposed by Dechen, to have a decentralized development to narrow that gap, it is simply a mammoth's task. To put in another word: Quite impossible. Just like a truth in itself, in that disparity.

After the class, in Facebook, Kinley let us know that she can provide a documentary on Capitalism. Kesang commented that China which had socialism in times of Mao has been replaced by capitalism since the time of Deng and has today reached the today’s height. He critiqued that the documentary is flawed with lack of understanding about capitalism and corporatism, that the documentary is about the latter one. And corporatism is a part of socialism.

I could, from these discussions, make a lining that government’s involvement in market brought in two different governance styles. If government involves, it’s socialism and the other otherwise.

Thanks to my unexpected acceptance of void of knowledge in economics and all these, and also intellectual friends, I am learning in RIM.

Alright now ….. I will watch the documentary Capitalism. This is second time now, I didn’t understand it the first time. 

Like Hector might I have 

Frozen at heart to it,

The roaring call of Achilles.

But as Goliath shall I 

Defeat famed Achilles

And learn all I encounter. 

ILiveLove